Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Unintentional Sexually Explicit Picture of the Month

Today's forecast is "cloudy with a chance of penis."
This is a storm front that I could definitely get behind, or in front of for that matter :)

Monday, March 22, 2010

I like sex and candy

Question:
I like food and I like sex.. can I have both at once?

Answer:
Ahh yes the age old question, How many pleasurable things can I do at once? You can incorporate food into the bedroom and it can be fun but don't get carried away. There are some rules that you should consider while making your coital culinary choices.

Feeling hot hot hot
As a rule... if your mouth burns when you eat it, your nether regions are sure to feel the same. Proceed with caution when using any foods that have cinnamon, menthol, mint, pepper, hot sauces etc.. A little tingle is nice but sometimes the concentration of these spicy foods can be way more than you want.

Size does matter
Remember when using any types of foods that you don't want to loose anything in a vagina or an anus. Take into consideration shape, size and texture when choosing foods. Try rubbing the foods on the inside of your wrist and see how it feels. Think cucumber instead of pineapple.

Just say no!
Any type of product that has sugar or oil in it is a no no for the down low. Oil breaks down latex and can deteriorate a condom and is really hard to wash off the skin. Sugary products thrive in warm, moist areas and encourages growth of yeast and bacteria. If you want to use syrup, chocolate, honey or oils use them above the belt!

Make sure that you and your partner wash up after using any types of foods to prevent infections. If you are inserting anything into the vagina or anus you may want to cover it with condom. As always, be creative and have fun. The kitchen may become your new favorite place to be!


Friday, March 19, 2010

Going Green and Getting Sexy

Earth Day is right around the corner... How many times have you found yourself wondering "Gee I really wish my dildos were more earth friendly" or "Yeah this whip is awesome but has it been made from recycled rubber" Well no need to wonder anymore, there are a number of environmentally friendly sex toys.

Where can I find them?
Earth Erotics
Earth Angel
Good Vibrations
Cosmo's Vegan Shop

What is earth friendly?
- Solar powered vibrator
- Whip made from recycled rubber
- Battery free vibrators
- Organic natural lubrications
- Vegan condoms
- Rechargeable vibrators
- Recycled glass dildos

If none of these ideas tickle your fancy or you are attached to your vibrator, you can always buy rechargeable batteries.

As always have fun and experiment with ways to go green in bed. If all else fails just go have sex in the woods :)

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Sprained Sausage?

Question:
I think that I either sprained or broke my penis... is that even possible?

Answer:
It depends what you were doing. Some men can sprain or strain their penis by masturbating a little too vigorously. One reason that I have heard the most is when the man is penetrating a penis or anus and when thy are thrusting they slip out and jam their penis into the pubic bone or the buttocks. Think of it like stubbing your toe....but it's your penis. A stubbed penis? No that just doesn't sound right.

I think I need a cast.
It is unlikely however, yes it is possible to 'break your penis'. Well there is a bit more to it than that but you can indeed strain and even rupture your corpus cavernosum. The corpus cavernosum is the chamber in the penis that fills with blood to give you a boner. Since there is no actual bone in the boner you cannot break your penis, but this rupture is what would be considered a 'broken penis.' Some people experience a popping sound when this happens like cracking your knuckles or if you ever tore your ACL...that type of popping. This is actually a serious medical emergency and if you believe that you have broken your penis it is recommended that you take a trip to the emergency room. They will check you out and probably take an MRI or an ultrasound. You will probably see a urologist and might possibly need surgery to correct the rupture.

I don't think it's broken can I just sling it?
If you don't think that its broken then you should probably take it easy for awhile killer. If pain persists, if there is swelling or if you are having trouble urinating I would recommend making an appointment with either your primary care physician or an urologist.

No matter how embarrassing you may think it will be to tell the nurse or doctor that you think that you broke your boner, maimed your member, sprained your sausage, or destroyed your dick.... you need to see a health care professional to make sure you have not caused any serious damage to your ding-a-ling.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Burning Man

Questions:
My penis hurts like a mofo when I pee, what is going on?

Answer:
Welcome to the wonderful world of Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). The most common STIs that have symptoms of buring with urination are Chlamydia and Gonorrhea.

Any other symptoms?
There are other symptoms that are associated with these STIs as well like a yellowish/whiteish discharge from your penis, pain, swelling or tenderness in the testicles.

Hard to spell easy to get:
Chlamydia can be transmitted through vaginal, anal, and oral sex. Gonorrhea can be transmitted through contact with the penis, vagina, mouth, or anus (ejaculation does not have to occur). Both Gonorrhea and Chlamydia are curable with antibiotics if you go to a health care provider to get it checked out.

No way it is an STI:
If you don't believe that there is any way that you could have gotten an STI, this could also be an urinary tract infection (UTI). UTIs also have symptoms of painful urination as well as frequent urination. UTIs are much more common in women but men can get them and can be treated with antibiotics.

The take away message here is if you are having pain with urination then you need to go see a health care provider. If you are sexually active (yes that includes oral sex) I would recommend getting regularly tested for STIs not only to protect yourself but to protect your partner(s). If you are hooking up please use a condom!

Friday, March 5, 2010

Unintentional Sexually Explicit Video of the Month

Why is it that people making the jerking off motion is just so funny? This is the Today Show in Australia and they are demonstrating how to play Wii curling... Check it out for yourselves.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Ben Whaaaaat?

Question:
What are Ben Wa Balls?

Answer:
Ben Wa balls are used to enhance sexual pleasure and to do kegel exercises (pelvic floor muscles).

That's great, but what are they?
Ben Wa balls also can be known as Geisha Balls or Burmese Balls. They are usually metal balls about the size of a golf ball that contain tiny weights or chimes that move around inside. They are also sometimes plastic. Remember the relaxation balls that you would move around in your hands? ...yeah just like them. Except instead of putting them in your hands, you put them in your vagina and/or anus.

Kegels
Think of it like weight lifting for your vagina. It is the same as the kegel exercises; you squeeze your pelvic floor muscles around the balls and try to keep them in without falling out. There exercises are recommended to increase your pelvic floor muscles and to help with bladder control.

Sexy Stimulation
There are many ways to use the Ben Wa balls but whichever way you use them and whatever hole you put them in good sensations are sure to occur. Some like to insert them and rock back and forth allowing the balls to move back and forth, some just like the feeling of them inside, since they are metal you can also play with the temperature of the balls put them in some cold water or warm water (NOT THE FREEZER OR BOILING WATER). Be creative try walking around the house, riding in the car on your way home.

Be creative try new techniques or try them out in new places. As always have fun or in this case have a ball.